Acro
Self-requested Deactivation
- Joined
- Apr 6, 2013
- Posts
- 941
- Location
- -retired-
- Society
- Freelancer
- Avatar Name
- Acronoid
After a sad LG (sad because of the long disconnect); I found out that my favourite character of D&D solum died (roleplay game I follow). So because of this a bag of bad jokes:
Man: Doctor, I've broken my leg.
Doctor: I'm afraid it is a very bad break. You will never walk again.
A man walks into a pub.
He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family.
Why do women fake orgasms?
Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.
What do you get if you cross a horse and a donkey?
A mule.
A priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on a plane.
However, it is a short flight and they do not talk to each other.
An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.
What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.
You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.
What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing, they don't live on the same continent.
Why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator? Because he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed rather inappropriate.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse, unable to speak English, shits on the floor and leaves.
A man walks into a bar. He needed three stitches on his forehead.
A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.
What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig? A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.
Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Repeated absences and stealing.
Why did the little pig squeal? He was going through the blades at the slaughterhouse.
Man: Doctor, I've broken my leg.
Doctor: I'm afraid it is a very bad break. You will never walk again.
A man walks into a pub.
He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family.
Why do women fake orgasms?
Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.
What do you get if you cross a horse and a donkey?
A mule.
A priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on a plane.
However, it is a short flight and they do not talk to each other.
An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.
What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.
You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.
What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing, they don't live on the same continent.
Why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator? Because he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed rather inappropriate.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse, unable to speak English, shits on the floor and leaves.
A man walks into a bar. He needed three stitches on his forehead.
A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.
What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig? A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.
Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Repeated absences and stealing.
Why did the little pig squeal? He was going through the blades at the slaughterhouse.