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What does a VU/patch day @ MAHQ look like?

the_prophet

the_prophet

Dominant
Banned
Joined
Feb 4, 2012
Posts
355
Hey there devs and forum users!

I'd like to get an idea of how a VU/patch day looks like @ MA, more exactly in a sense of maybe how the actual VU goes from MA employee perspective;

example:

8 AM;
- everyone comes to the office, greets each other, they drink a quick coffee and go smoke one before the 9 AM pre-VU meeting, where they discuss the content of VU/patch and benefits of it for the game, what can go wrong and maybe go through backup plan A/plan B, if this or that goes wrong, then suddenly;

10 AM;
- the responsible team member makes sure server(?) is set up properly, to backup all data when it disconnects the clients and takes it down while the rest of the guys are trolling him because he is the only one that has to work during this time :D

10:15 AM;
- patch time! the guys that laughed a tad earlier, now have to work :D the guy they were trolling gets himself a cup of coffee and trolls everyone back - with a mug of hot joe in his hand :D

10:30 AM;
- boss wants an update on how the vu/patch is going and makes so that the text "What's taking you guys soo loooong! I wanna harvest some trees already, whatsup!?" gets displayed on every company wall tv that they have in the building.

10:35 AM;
- boss gets trolled back by receiving the "generic" reply from support, which the vu/patch leader had ordered them to send, saying that they are working on it and that they are sorry for the inconvenience etc... :D

10:45 AM;
- boss is checking the forum and constantly reopening the client server, has enough at this point and storms into the working place(?) where VU/patch is being done, only to be surprised by everyone because it's his birthday and then they have some cake, meanwhile the guy responsible for getting the server back online has to do his solo thing again so the tides turn once more :D

10:55 AM; The Game is up and running!!! Everyone quickly logs in to their accounts to see what will emerge from this VU/patch.

11:00 AM; Everything is working fine, everyone can relax, since its boss' birthday, a round of :beerchug: for everyone, everyone runs down to the bar :D

A happy VU/patch/birthday? day :D MA maybe you can write the most crazy VU/patch day story or someone with more insight on how these things are done can write the real version :D


Oh and since its patch day, happy patch day to all :D
 
Since noone seems to have a clue about it, or doesn't want to reply in the thread, lets make it a "imaginary writings" thread instead :p

All your imaginary scenarios on the subject are welcome, hope some nice read is posted so we can have a laugh or two maybe :laugh:

Happy patch day!! :yay::yay:
 
I'm pretty sure this is the way it usually goes, or is that me after the patch? Hm...

7686178464_fdc8ea66c7.jpg
 
06:00: Darkness engulfing streets is shattered with the first drifts of the morning sun slicing through the trees like a hot butter knife through spaghetti.

07:00: A lone figure emerges from the parked vehicle, a hulk of a man, standing as tall as a 6 foot 3 inch tree.

07:10: The man approaches the entrance to MA headquarters, stopping just in time to avoid a window washer that has fallen, hitting the pavement like a hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

07:15: Stepping through the front door, the mans mind is focused on one thing: The version update that must occur today. Passing the waiting room, he spies a knew face, the face of his dreams, he knew this was the girl he was waiting for, but had never met. They were like two hummingbirds that had also never met.

08:00: After they met, they hurriedly put back on their clothes, sweat dripping like lubricated salmon at an all-night fish hatchery.

09:00: They do the version update.

10:00: They are done.

10:15: The workers promise not to start partying too early this time.

10:20: Someone finally gives in and calls their "guy", a lanky bean pole named Mookie.

10:30: 2 kilos arrive. Followed by 12 strippers...

Part 2 (coming soon...something just updated on the loader I gotta go!)
 
Prophet that's pretty close to what it was like 8 years ago, nowadays a guy hits a couple of buttons in the evening and another guy hits some other buttons in the morning then its done :).
 
Sunsout Gunsout said:
06:00: Darkness engulfing streets is shattered with the first drifts of the morning sun slicing through the trees like a hot butter knife through spaghetti.

07:00: A lone figure emerges from the parked vehicle, a hulk of a man, standing as tall as a 6 foot 3 inch tree.

07:10: The man approaches the entrance to MA headquarters, stopping just in time to avoid a window washer that has fallen, hitting the pavement like a hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

07:15: Stepping through the front door, the mans mind is focused on one thing: The version update that must occur today. Passing the waiting room, he spies a knew face, the face of his dreams, he knew this was the girl he was waiting for, but had never met. They were like two hummingbirds that had also never met.

08:00: After they met, they hurriedly put back on their clothes, sweat dripping like lubricated salmon at an all-night fish hatchery.

09:00: They do the version update.

10:00: They are done.

10:15: The workers promise not to start partying too early this time.

10:20: Someone finally gives in and calls their "guy", a lanky bean pole named Mookie.

10:30: 2 kilos arrive. Followed by 12 strippers...

Part 2 (coming soon...something just updated on the loader I gotta go!)
Click to expand...

Taco, all I have to say to your "story" is, don't quit your day job.
 
9:00 am - show up to work in a good mood thinking today will be best day of work ever.

10:00 am - get reminder that today is VU patch day, cancels best day ever.

11:00 am - take down servers start patch update

11:30 am - failed to update

12:01 pm - screw it time to eat go to lunch.

1:00 pm - ah full lets try this again.

1:30 pm - some stuff works some stuff doesn't. but it is running

2:00-3:00 pm - let upper management know of the issues

4:00-5:00 pm - upper management celebrates a successful FU (I mean update) to the players once again while sitting in their gold plated hot tubs drinking Domaine de la Romanee-Conti Romanee-Conti Grand Cru, Cote de Nuits, laughing at how all us dumb arses are buying strongboxes like crazy thinking we will get something worth our while.

6:00 pm - everyone goes home awaiting the next VU day
 
Kim|Calypso said:
Prophet that's pretty close to what it was like 8 years ago, nowadays a guy hits a couple of buttons in the evening and another guy hits some other buttons in the morning then its done :).
Click to expand...

:lam:

.....
 
Everybody comes in, gets their coffee and gets to work. Then, some dude presses some button. This is pretty much immediately followed by a terrifying scream coming from the support department, where the intern is experiencing his first heart attack.
 
Sorry my imagination is off today this will have to do, I worked my @$$ today :(
V4W41Qb.jpg
 


All wrong! They only work after the patch.
 
The button pressing in the evening guy reminds me a bit of Stimpy's agonies.
It must be soooo tempting to press it :eyecrazy:

 
Sunsout Gunsout said:
06:00: Darkness engulfing streets is shattered with the first drifts of the morning sun slicing through the trees like a hot butter knife through spaghetti.

07:00: A lone figure emerges from the parked vehicle, a hulk of a man, standing as tall as a 6 foot 3 inch tree.

07:10: The man approaches the entrance to MA headquarters, stopping just in time to avoid a window washer that has fallen, hitting the pavement like a hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

07:15: Stepping through the front door, the mans mind is focused on one thing: The version update that must occur today. Passing the waiting room, he spies a knew face, the face of his dreams, he knew this was the girl he was waiting for, but had never met. They were like two hummingbirds that had also never met.

08:00: After they met, they hurriedly put back on their clothes, sweat dripping like lubricated salmon at an all-night fish hatchery.

09:00: They do the version update.

10:00: They are done.

10:15: The workers promise not to start partying too early this time.

10:20: Someone finally gives in and calls their "guy", a lanky bean pole named Mookie.

10:30: 2 kilos arrive. Followed by 12 strippers...
Click to expand...
Jeoff said:
Taco, all I have to say to your "story" is, don't quit your day job.
Click to expand...
OMG u DO have haters! (and i thought that was a myth...)

Well he's soo wrong. The only right thing to do is to quit your day job! Yesss! :yay:
 
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