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The Tacotuesday Loot Theory Thread

atomicstorm

atomicstorm

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Because I am a master of dry humor, I suggested in team speak that I would write a book on all the loot theories that tacotuesday has ever stated and then have it published since he has 3 new ones every day since i have known him. With that said, because I am a man of my word, I am going to do just that. If for some reason that someone would ever buy such a book, all monies will go to cancer research otherwise it will just be published just for the hell of it so that wifi can put it on his wall and rub one out to it every night and tacotuesday will pay him to do said act for perpetuity.

So, if you have ever heard of a tacotuesday loot theory, please reply to this thread. Any clean illustrations in paint or otherwise would also be a bonus. Note that posting a loot theory will likely be used in a satirical publication (maybe) and credit for said attributions will be noted as footnotes unless otherwise requested.

Disclaimer: I realize this will inflate his ego to apocalyptic proportions (pun intended).... :popcorn:
 
Nooo. Aim your sights on taco... not me. :p
 
If mobs are clumped up...it's cuz one has a global on him and the others are trying to hide him.

When your gun sounds like it is shooting faster (without reload buff) loot will be good.

If Stig or Chasemlb dies, we will HoF.

Wifi's 10 Julbocks he carries around destroys my loot when he is healing me.

Those are just the first ones I can think of. I will post more when I remember them.

They are all 100% factually true and proved by scientists.
 
Mob evaded 4 times in a row and that means an ath is coming.
 
mobs that are hot for the day - many of them start with the same first letters.
so: Atrox, then Allo, then Ambulimax, mabye Atrax

Doing bad on Feffox? Try some Feffoid.

Now I know there are not a lot of letters represented, sometimes loose associations must be made.
I'll stop before it gets into the complicated scientific stuff.
 
Thrawls HoF a lot.

Lots and lots of guns drop off Longtooths.

Loot sucks when idiots drag Zombie Kong out of the Spawn area.

These may not be theories.... I think there is proof to these...
 
"blueprint loots are an important part of crafting"

but I believe this was first stated by Sir Obvious, Esq. circa 1654.
 
K-Max said:
Thrawls HoF a lot.

Lots and lots of guns drop off Longtooths.

Loot sucks when idiots drag Zombie Kong out of the Spawn area.
Click to expand...

Fact. buts its glob not hof.

Fact.

Fact.

Proven by scientist too.
 
If loot is bad, it is because MA representative handed it over to <insert wss member> by carrying it all around in PvP 4 and dying on purpose.
 
WhiningSkeptic said:
If loot is bad, it is because MA representative handed it over to <insert wss member> by carrying it all around in PvP 4 and dying on purpose.
Click to expand...

Fact, they did that to give it to WSS because the Rx Unit healed himself as we shot it for 5 minutes until a WSS guy showed up, then after the WSS guy killed us, the Rx Unit stopped healing and stood there letting the WSS guy loot him. And so our loot sucked, and WSS's didn't you are correct.
 
Sunsout Gunsout said:
Fact, they did that to give it to WSS because the Rx Unit healed himself as we shot it for 5 minutes until a WSS guy showed up, then after the WSS guy killed us, the Rx Unit stopped healing and stood there letting the WSS guy loot him. And so our loot sucked, and WSS's didn't you are correct.
Click to expand...

I'll have to explain why that happened at some point. That wasn't mindark and you won't like it... at all. :)
 
Last edited:
atomicstorm said:
I'll have to explain why that happened at some point. That wasn't mindark and you won't like it... at all. :)
Click to expand...

Eh then it was Planet Calypso, not MA, but that's just like saying, "oh that's not a Great Blue Heron...that's a bird!"
 
Sunsout Gunsout said:
Eh then it was Planet Calypso, not MA, but that's just like saying, "oh that's not a Great Blue Heron...that's a bird!"
Click to expand...

Not that either. I wasn't splitting hairs with PP and MA. You'll understand when I tell you.

Anyway.. back on topic.
 
If there's a "T" in the day Taco won't hof because MA don't want to be accused of favouring him.

[I made that one up :yay:]
 
WhiningSkeptic said:
If loot is bad, it is because MA representative handed it over to <insert wss member> by carrying it all around in PvP 4 and dying on purpose.
Click to expand...

And if in event a Huskk is spawned and server crashes, MA representative will come kill mob, and hof big, then put loot on ground for 3 people too pick up. True storry :yup:
 
slick27 said:
If i didn't get it, it didn't happen! ;)
Click to expand...

Haha that one is total fact too.

Whenever someone says to me "omg taco, you missed it...." I get so pissed.

No I didn't fucking miss it, I wasn't there, it wasn't mine to get!

Can't be on 24/7 and on all the planets at once :)
 
The loot is only good when MA's favorites are hunting, but if you hunt when they hunt, all your loot will go to them! :eyecrazy:

(hey Taco, I can't find the "Bird Theory" thread, link me!) :silly2:
 
Sunsout Gunsout said:
Haha that one is total fact too.

Whenever someone says to me "omg taco, you missed it...." I get so pissed.

No I didn't fucking miss it, I wasn't there, it wasn't mine to get!

Can't be on 24/7 and on all the planets at once :)
Click to expand...

Chuck Norris could.
 
- it's a fact that getting triple perceptions equals a major hof is coming.
 
If you make a team name with the name "Taco" in it it's ten times more likely to ATH if it has an insult it. MA hates Taco and they want want good Taco insults to be immortalized.
 
The system knows.

If you deposit, you get a small hof, then it will assrape you out of your money knowing that you will pull up your credit card again.
 
Sunsout Gunsout said:
If mobs are clumped up...it's cuz one has a global on him and the others are trying to hide him.
[snip!]
They are all 100% factually true and proved by scientists.
Click to expand...

I can conform that this is true! But sometimes the mobs sneek the global away and that makes me very sad.

Also, when a non-agressive mob attacks you out of the blue, it is because it has good loot or a good item and want to give it to you.

When you have lootlag, MA is taking the good stuff out of your loot so you're left with only 2PED worth of oils.

Jumping from one place to the next with your TT-chip, killing all mobs that attack you/ are in range and then TT-chipping out again to a different kind of mob will 1000-fold you changes of an ATH or rare item. I haven't been able to prove it for a fact yet, but it's so true I can almost taste the mob that will make me famous! :yay:
 
There is no such thing as dunkel
 
It is a fact that taco's HOF had dinner with my ATH got it drunk !!!!! it, ate it and then it got lost in the desert for months, after running out of ammo taco and stg stumbled upon it and preceded to kill it with swords........ The rest is history
 
Always repair your swords when you go out for a 24h hunt :wise:
 
How to sort out the real Taco theories and the fake ones...

:scratch2:
 
kyuss said:
There is no such thing as dunkel
Click to expand...

This is true...

BUT...if I ever got a tower of it, the first thing I am doing is running Gargul Laser Sights on condition.
 
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