Count Vamp

pfesler

Old Alpha
Joined
Mar 21, 2011
Posts
780
For years now, as I hunt I have been traumatized by the sight of a gray, dangly, beribboned, and completely unsettling Transylvanian boorum super cock. The time has come that I ask, in all seriousness, Why MA? WHY! Why, everytime that I go search for a cloak, am I confronted with not only the gruesomely down syndromed visage of the Count, but also the inevitability of what I must assume is donkey's hang low? I want to know the person responsible in the development meeting that piped up with the annoyingly "artistic" twist, "Let's give him a massive schlong. It will add character". Who is this repressed soul? Did it come from the top? Was it David himself? Or was it a lowly intern, shuffling about, pouring brandy into unsuspecting developers coffees and whispering "funny" thoughts into their alcohol laced minds? Was it a player? I can name at least 9 sick bastards in this forsaken game that could have lit this phallic fire. (Fort, Corvette, Linzey).

I want answers.
 
weekend, fine time to wonder about the origin of "appendages" :D
good luck with your quest!
 
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Do I sense some envy here? :p
 
I don't get it - what is this about? Is this post saying that Count Vamp has a bigger, longer schlong than the Buffalo guy?
 
I'm sure it was a act of a single person at MA and nobody ever noticed it because they didn't enter the instance even ONCE before it was launched to use. If they did enter it then they must have noticed following

-It is way to dark (if shaders isn't set to max)
-When you die you are bound to aggro mobs on you since re spawn is to close
-When you re spawn there is not much error to be done before you exit the instance by accident
-Way to many obstacles that mobs hit when you tag them from range
-If you die on vamp there is no good path to come back to him without getting mobs on you (I found my way but still..)
 
LOL

Me?!?! You name me as sick bastard? :scratch2:

Your the one spending a fine Saturday contemplating "appendages" :wise:

Lol Faltly, go buy some more evil essences and study that bow tied cock some more :laugh:
 
With the new trend, i am surprised MA didn't replaced the bow with a ring.
 
I don't get it - what is this about? Is this post saying that Count Vamp has a bigger, longer schlong than the Buffalo guy?

Have you seen the Count? That guy's a freaking Tripod :eyecrazy:
 
For years now, as I hunt I have been traumatized by the sight of a gray, dangly, beribboned, and completely unsettling Transylvanian boorum super cock. The time has come that I ask, in all seriousness, Why MA? WHY! Why, everytime that I go search for a cloak, am I confronted with not only the gruesomely down syndromed visage of the Count, but also the inevitability of what I must assume is donkey's hang low? I want to know the person responsible in the development meeting that piped up with the annoyingly "artistic" twist, "Let's give him a massive schlong. It will add character". Who is this repressed soul? Did it come from the top? Was it David himself? Or was it a lowly intern, shuffling about, pouring brandy into unsuspecting developers coffees and whispering "funny" thoughts into their alcohol laced minds? Was it a player? I can name at least 9 sick bastards in this forsaken game that could have lit this phallic fire. (Fort, Corvette, Linzey).

I want answers.

Are you intimidated by the size of his little thing? All you have to do is kill the count out of jealousy...
 
For years now, as I hunt I have been traumatized by the sight of a gray, dangly, beribboned, and completely unsettling Transylvanian boorum super cock. The time has come that I ask, in all seriousness, Why MA? WHY! Why, everytime that I go search for a cloak, am I confronted with not only the gruesomely down syndromed visage of the Count, but also the inevitability of what I must assume is donkey's hang low? I want to know the person responsible in the development meeting that piped up with the annoyingly "artistic" twist, "Let's give him a massive schlong. It will add character". Who is this repressed soul? Did it come from the top? Was it David himself? Or was it a lowly intern, shuffling about, pouring brandy into unsuspecting developers coffees and whispering "funny" thoughts into their alcohol laced minds? Was it a player? I can name at least 9 sick bastards in this forsaken game that could have lit this phallic fire. (Fort, Corvette, Linzey).

I want answers.

Oh lighten up.
 
Jelousy has an ugly ..."head" ?
Just shoot him in the head in first person , dont stare at his junk :laugh:
 
I can live with the "appendage" but the red bow just cracks me up :)
 
Maybe instead of a cloak you will loot one of these ^^

attachment.php
 
During Halloween in other games you get free stuff and here we get Count Vamp :)... MA really hates players.
 
Maybe instead of a cloak you will loot one of these ^^

The skin on that "appendage" can be made into a texture and used to customize the seats of PRX Roadster(C)(L) and other luxury cars. It is said that it is the finest leather in the world.
 
Damage-types seems buggy, should be more stab & penetration :yup:

Definitely 90% penetration.
Also, can you get vamp DNA out of this I wonder?
Where is the lube protection? I'd feel safer having that in my pocket, even if I'm a guy. It could reduce penetration damage quite a lot.
 
This thread is not a debate against damage type. It is irrelevant here.
It can't hurt.
The cock is a lie.
It cant hit you, it does have no hitbox.
Try it.
 
+2k for the Broom weapon!

O wait its not what it seems I just want to beat people to death with it in pvp thats all.
 
I'm complexed again... well, hey honey you look nice today, i love you you know.
 
Lol...whitenut neg repped me, saying "It's an 18+ game".

First off, I'm just trolling. It's humorous, not serious.

Secondly, your neg rep and comment seem to imply that MA was sitting around and someone noted, " Hey! We almost forgot! Adults will play this game..better put some cock in it!" Your surprise and disdain over my bewilderment of said cock indicates that you'd be upset if there were not, in fact, some or many large cocks in a game intended for adults to play.

Thank you for your funny reply and your neg rep...it was worth ze laughs. :)
 
Maybe instead of a cloak you will loot one of these ^^

attachment.php

:confused: Should do Penetration or not?? :silly2:

I think its funny how the Count looks.

But why is there no !!!! ..:scratch2: i mean Countess of Boorum?

wtf? !!!! its not allowed to write c-u-n-t? Pussy :D
 
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As long as the Count's appendage may be, he certainly has problems getting it up. Count Flaccid might be a better name?
 
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