HardWrath
Marauder
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2005
- Posts
- 6,038
- Location
- Wisconsin, USA
- Society
- Freelancer
- Avatar Name
- Max HardWrath Mayhem
Hello all.
I understand that I am an asshole for not finding a way to communicate with someone/anyone in EU, to at least tell people that I'm alive. I have an inbox with similar descriptive words of me and I wont hold it against anyone.
I am truly sorry that I have not logged in to EU, this forum, my email, etc for over a year. My IRL situation took a series of dramatic turns for the worse. I feel very bad that I have not reached out to anyone in EU.
I know that a few of you wont forgive me for that. I know that my abrupt absence caused some to fear the worst had happened. There have been times where I feared that the worst would happen but I am still here and I hope that God has a plan for me. What that plan might be, I certainly don't know.
I have been juggling a series of health issues, employment issues, and financial issues... none of which would be appropriate to discuss on a public internet forum for a video game. Really some things aren't appropriate even to discuss IRL. For over a year I have been without access to the internet in a way where I could use it for personal use... not even a smartphone.
I think/hope that I am on the other side of my more serious health issue but I will continue to deal with other things for the rest of my life. Financially, I'm screwed at the moment. That's the best possible way to summarize it. My living situation is less than ideal and is absolutely toxic for me. Already I feel like its too much info but I also feel that I at least owe some generalized details.
For a while now, I have been walking to and from work everyday in Green Bay Wisconsin during winter, with my basic $25 pre-paid cellphone that could only make phone calls from the call history in the phone because half of the buttons no longer worked.
Two weeks ago, I lost my job, again, and its for reasons that are outside of my control. As much as that only increases my short term problems, there is a silver lining to it because it allows me to cash out a very small retirement account that was through my employer. With these funds I should be able to purchase an inexpensive vehicle that runs and from there choose a new employment path. Really a new life path.
With my spare time, a handful of times per month, I have gotten back into fishing, something I had not been serious about since I was a kid. Fishing was my first real passion in life and I feel fortunate to have rediscovered it. I just fish from shore, but manage to catch some impressive fish. The most recent was two 29" Walleye as well as a 56" Muskie.
Fishing has been the one positive in my life. The physical activity from it, and from walking to work has been helpful.
Typing all of this brings tears to my eyes.
If I could ask a favor of everyone. Please don't bombard me with questions about my situation IRL. Its hard to discuss and already this post contains more information than 99% of people know IRL. All of us are dealt cards in life that are less than ideal at times. For some of us, we are in situations that may be too much to handle. I feel like that's my situation. I don't have a handle on it. All that I can do is choose to look forward and not backwards and this is something that I'm struggling with.
Due to my situation, I am unable to play EU in the way that I used to. I cant do the daily 8-10+ hour marathon days. I have to maintain some basic level of physical activity, focus on IRL, and continue trying to slowly get back into shape. I can not allow EU to become an escape for me again because I know where that path leads.
I am downloading EU but I am uncertain if this PC will even run EU. It probably will and we will see in about a half hour. My intent is to return to EU, on a much more limited/normal basis.
I hope all of you are well.
-HardWrath
I understand that I am an asshole for not finding a way to communicate with someone/anyone in EU, to at least tell people that I'm alive. I have an inbox with similar descriptive words of me and I wont hold it against anyone.
I am truly sorry that I have not logged in to EU, this forum, my email, etc for over a year. My IRL situation took a series of dramatic turns for the worse. I feel very bad that I have not reached out to anyone in EU.
I know that a few of you wont forgive me for that. I know that my abrupt absence caused some to fear the worst had happened. There have been times where I feared that the worst would happen but I am still here and I hope that God has a plan for me. What that plan might be, I certainly don't know.
I have been juggling a series of health issues, employment issues, and financial issues... none of which would be appropriate to discuss on a public internet forum for a video game. Really some things aren't appropriate even to discuss IRL. For over a year I have been without access to the internet in a way where I could use it for personal use... not even a smartphone.
I think/hope that I am on the other side of my more serious health issue but I will continue to deal with other things for the rest of my life. Financially, I'm screwed at the moment. That's the best possible way to summarize it. My living situation is less than ideal and is absolutely toxic for me. Already I feel like its too much info but I also feel that I at least owe some generalized details.
For a while now, I have been walking to and from work everyday in Green Bay Wisconsin during winter, with my basic $25 pre-paid cellphone that could only make phone calls from the call history in the phone because half of the buttons no longer worked.
Two weeks ago, I lost my job, again, and its for reasons that are outside of my control. As much as that only increases my short term problems, there is a silver lining to it because it allows me to cash out a very small retirement account that was through my employer. With these funds I should be able to purchase an inexpensive vehicle that runs and from there choose a new employment path. Really a new life path.
With my spare time, a handful of times per month, I have gotten back into fishing, something I had not been serious about since I was a kid. Fishing was my first real passion in life and I feel fortunate to have rediscovered it. I just fish from shore, but manage to catch some impressive fish. The most recent was two 29" Walleye as well as a 56" Muskie.
Fishing has been the one positive in my life. The physical activity from it, and from walking to work has been helpful.
Typing all of this brings tears to my eyes.
If I could ask a favor of everyone. Please don't bombard me with questions about my situation IRL. Its hard to discuss and already this post contains more information than 99% of people know IRL. All of us are dealt cards in life that are less than ideal at times. For some of us, we are in situations that may be too much to handle. I feel like that's my situation. I don't have a handle on it. All that I can do is choose to look forward and not backwards and this is something that I'm struggling with.
Due to my situation, I am unable to play EU in the way that I used to. I cant do the daily 8-10+ hour marathon days. I have to maintain some basic level of physical activity, focus on IRL, and continue trying to slowly get back into shape. I can not allow EU to become an escape for me again because I know where that path leads.
I am downloading EU but I am uncertain if this PC will even run EU. It probably will and we will see in about a half hour. My intent is to return to EU, on a much more limited/normal basis.
I hope all of you are well.
-HardWrath